Where you are so content you wonder if you are missing something?
I am having it--mostly the contentness--but I almost feel like it cannot be that easy. Shouldn't I be waiting for the other shoe to drop? The body slam that almost always comes from somewhere?
But I do not FEEL that--its just a niggling thought in the back of my head that maybe I should be on high alert. Sometimes I wish my brain would shut up. Shut up and let me live in a world where anxiety does not rule me. Eighty percent of my anxiety is gone now that I have changed jobs, and another 15% of it has been removed by my decision to stop letting the past rule my heart and feelings....there is just a little niggling bit of alarm in the background yelling at me to be aware.
I guess this is what healing feels like. You never forget, and often do not get to understand, but sometimes you just have to let go and realize there is nothing you can do to change things. And that is how it is supposed to be.
Onward and upward now--into the next stage of my world. It looks like a pretty nice place.
I am having it--mostly the contentness--but I almost feel like it cannot be that easy. Shouldn't I be waiting for the other shoe to drop? The body slam that almost always comes from somewhere?
But I do not FEEL that--its just a niggling thought in the back of my head that maybe I should be on high alert. Sometimes I wish my brain would shut up. Shut up and let me live in a world where anxiety does not rule me. Eighty percent of my anxiety is gone now that I have changed jobs, and another 15% of it has been removed by my decision to stop letting the past rule my heart and feelings....there is just a little niggling bit of alarm in the background yelling at me to be aware.
I guess this is what healing feels like. You never forget, and often do not get to understand, but sometimes you just have to let go and realize there is nothing you can do to change things. And that is how it is supposed to be.
Onward and upward now--into the next stage of my world. It looks like a pretty nice place.
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1 comments:
You will learn to quit looking for the hidden danger--just takes time. You did not get scared of it over night, and it won't go away that fast. But it will go away.
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