How Reality TV teaches us lessons

Number one: Do not refer to yourself in the third person until you are very very very famous and we can forgive you for being a fruitcake.

This fool Suede just got kicked off of Project Runway, and thank God--it is way past time. Who does he think he is? Best thing he said all season was "Suede is going home". GOOD. I am sick of you calling yourself Suede. And for Pete's sake, did you name yourself that? Did your blue hair dye leak through to your brain and make you think that was cute? It is not. I hope someone tells you that so I do not have to write you a letter and 'splain it to you, you fool. And WHY do these fools think making their hair blue make them look edgy? Anyone can buy the blue hair dye-- it just ain't that original.

I still liked him better than that other idiot on there that is already kicked off--Blaine. He called everything something-icios. He called his dummy Girlicious. It made me crazy. He also said "Holla at your boy" all the time. To Tim Gunn. For real. Has no one ever told him that he is a little bitty white boy? You know he got his butt kicked everyday at school growing up--has he forgotten that already?

Why do I watch this stuff?

Ok,. gotta go--Top Design is on. There is probably another lesson in here that I must siphon through to present you---I am all about the public service people. I will put myself through 48 hours of reality TV a week just to boil these little gems down for you so that you can live your lives and rely on me to give you the bullet points.

Hold your applause.